The Vine - News Blog

A Word from the Pastor: The words they need to hear

 
By Beth Evers
 
I’ll never forget the first email I received from Ben Disney regarding my appointment here. He started with a note of welcome and then there was an overview of some of my responsibilities and what I could expect on my first Sunday. But there was one line that completely caught me off guard. In signing the email, Ben wrote, “Welcome home, Evers.” Even as I type this today, I find myself getting a little misty-eyed. Whether he knew it or not, these were exactly the words I needed to hear… welcome home.
 

Over the past three years, Arborlawn has become both a home and a family to our family. Our little boys were welcomed with open arms. And, as I stood mortified watching them play around with a wheelchair one Sunday morning, one of their church “aunts” smiled, assured me they were fine, and took them for a spin! They knew they were home the first time they were welcomed to Sunday School and every day since. I will never forget the love and care you offered my husband as we grieved the loss of his father. You showed us compassion and love through every card, hug, email, and phone call. And then you prayed us all the way to China and back as we brought our little girl home. In an instant, our little girl had more family than she ever could have dreamed of and you made her feel like the princess she is.
 
I don’t have the words to express how grateful I am to have been part of this family called Arborlawn. It is my great joy to tell people about this place and the people here. You love and care for one another in impressive and grace-filled ways. You reach out to the world with God’s love and mercy. You challenge yourselves to learn and grow in your faith. You live and breathe the Gospel in powerful ways, and I have learned countless things from you. I know I will be a better pastor and a stronger Christian because of the time I have spent with you.
 
As I prepare to leave for University United Methodist Church in just a few weeks, I will take a piece of you with me. My prayer is that you will continue to welcome individuals with the same love and care you showed our family. I believe that as you move through this world, you have the unique opportunity to share a gift with people who desperately need it – the love of Jesus Christ. You also have the words they need to hear: “Welcome home.” Thank you for sharing those gifts!
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Nine Rules and Six Truths

 
By Ben Disney
 
Congratulations to our graduating seniors! We’re immensely proud of our seniors and look forward to what God has in store for each graduate in the coming years. Along with our deepest prayers and support, we leave you with nine rules and six truths to help guide you as you begin a wonderful new journey of faith and discovery. (Read biographies of Arborlawn's 2012 Graduating Seniors starting here.)
 

In 2007, Charles J. Sykes wrote a book called “50 Rules Kids Won’t Learn In School: Real World Antidotes to Feel Good Education.” Here are nine of the rules:
 
Nine Rules You Won’t Learn in School
 
1) Life is not fair; get used to it!
 
2) The world won’t care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something before you feel good about yourself.
 
3) You will not make $60,000 a year right out of high school (or college for that matter).
 
4) If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.
 
5) Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping; they called it opportunity.
 
6) If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault. So don’t whine about your mistakes; learn from them.
 
7) Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to anything  in real life.
 
8) Television is not real life.
 
9) Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.
 
Six Truths You Learned in Church
 
Proverbs 3:5-6 - “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.”
 
Jeremiah 29:11 - “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
 
Proverbs 23:18-19 - “There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off. Listen, be wise, and keep your heart on the right path.”
 
Mark 12:29-31 - “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel, the LORD our God, the LORD is one. Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.”
 
Micah 6:8 - “He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”
 
Philippians 1:6 - “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Broken in

 
By Ben Disney
 
The pews had been in the former Sanctuary for more than 40 years. When the decision was made to construct a new Sanctuary at Arborlawn the question was: “What do we do with the old pews?”
   
The former Sanctuary is now being converted to a Family Life Center that will soon serve as a wonderful venue for sports and recreation as well as special events for people of all ages and stages. The conversion of the former Sanctuary and creation of a new Family Life Center is made possible because of the generosity of an anonymous donor and the hard work of volunteers from the Saints and Sinners Sunday School class.
    
We’re pleased to say all the pews in the former Sanctuary now have new homes. Some of them were picked up and delivered to a small Catholic church in Arkansas thanks to arrangements made by our own Blake Woodard. The remaining pews were picked up last week by volunteers and members of Morgan Mill UMC. Morgan Mill is a small town near Stephenville. The group from Morgan Mill UMC brought five trailers and a number of volunteers to complete the task of dismantling each pew and loading them on the trailers for the ride back to their new location.
 

I had a couple of thoughts when I watched the pews being loaded on the trailers in preparation for the ride home. First, I was so glad another congregation had a need we could help with. We never want anything to go to waste. If another church can use them, then our task is to give them away and share the blessing. It’s good stewardship. Secondly, I felt good that another congregation will be able to use the same pews that have been used on this site for more than forty years. They’re more than pieces of furniture. They’re the pews that generations of Christians have used to sing the hymns of our faith, bowing their heads in prayer for one another, hearing the Word proclaimed, and receiving the holy sacraments. The people who sat on those pews did so carrying the deepest fears, the biggest questions, the greatest joys life has to offer, and searching for a faith that’s big enough to hold it all together.
   
So when the good people of Morgan Mill UMC sit on those pews for the first time in their worship service, I hope they know that they carry a history and a story with them. Those pews, whether they know it or not, have been broken in. I hope that in some way the pews will remind them that as Christians we’re all connected at the deepest level.
   
One final note. As the group from Morgan Mill UMC were preparing to leave, they came to me with a gift. They called it a love offering. In dismantling the pews they found $4.86 cents in change buried in the cushions of the pews. It made me laugh. Just so you know, I put it in Arborlawn’s Building Fund; which is another reminder that when church happens nobody ever leaves empty handed.
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Three critical questions

 
By Ben Disney
 
1. Why do people need Christ?
 
2. Why do people need the church?
            
3. Why do they need this particular church?
 
“Without an answer a church will flounder. Without deep conviction about the responses to these questions, a pastor will never lead a congregation to change the world. But when a pastor, a church leader, or a congregation is clear about the answers, and able to inspire others about the answers to these questions, the power of the church begins to be unleashed.” From “Leading Beyond the Walls” by Adam Hamilton
 
Our staff is about to spend part of tomorrow (Friday) wrestling with the answers to those three critical questions. The wording of each question is vitally important and the actual order in which they appear is just as crucial.
 
First things first: “Why do people need Christ?” It’s not an easy question. There are millions of people in the world who have given little thought to the idea they might actually need whatever it is that Christ could give them. They’re people who by most standards are relatively successful, relatively independent, and relatively happy. Why do they need Christ? Sometimes the perception is you don’t really need Christ unless you’re in the midst of a life threatening crisis or a terrifying ordeal that leaves you devastated, scared and alone. Even the non religious among us will cry out for a higher power when the bullets begin flying or the doctor comes back with a report that makes you feels like the world you knew has just ended.
 

But what about the majority of people who live out everyday doing the best they can, working hard, doing the right thing, all the while enduring the occasional heartaches of life and enjoying the moments that bring them happiness? Why do they need Christ?
 
I’ll share some of the answers we discovered but first I want to invite you to ask the hard questions as well. Personally, individually, in the context of a class, or just in a group of friends start to think about how you would answer the three questions. If you can’t answer the questions, or if your response sounds like some well rehearsed and rehashed line from someone else, then perhaps it’s time to start digging deeper.
 
Why do people need Christ? Or, better yet, start with this: Why do you need Christ?
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: The chance to fully live

 
By Ben Disney
 
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.
An 18th century children’s bedtime prayer
 
In 1902, as he lay dying at the age of 48, Cecil Rhodes could look back on a not undistinguished career. He had made a vast fortune in gold and diamonds. He had built railroads through the wilderness and become one of the century’s great rulers. He had created an empire, which is more than your average 48-year-old has on his resume. But Rhodes was not going gently into any good night. On his deathbed he was heard muttering, “So little done, so much to do.” [ John Tierney, Forbes Magazine, 2007 ]
  
A bucket list of must see places waiting to be discovered in locations around the world. Among the “1000 places” in the book are historic sites such as Robert Louis Stevenson’s home in Western Samoa and the trail of the Lewis and Clark Expedition in the United States, cultural ones such as the Oregon Shakespeare Festival in the United States, and La Scala in Italy, natural ones such as the Grand Canyon in the United States and the Dead Sea in Israel.  [ From 1000 Places to See Before You Die by Patricia Schultz ]
 
It’s an interesting exercise. Put together your own bucket list. If you could map out the remainder of your life and have the resources to do anything you wish, what would you do? What sites would you see? What goals would you set? What dreams would you follow? What kind of spiritual pilgrimage would you take?
 

My guess is that some of us would include an exotic location or a never-been-there-before destination; others would list something less obvious and much more private and personal. Whatever is on your bucket list says volumes about what’s inside of you.
 
In the end, it’s not as much about the specific destination as it is about the passion. It’s not about arriving in a particular place but about awakening the Spirit inside of you. The journey is always more important than the destination. It’s not about the list. It’s about life; life with all its joys and sorrows, pain, happiness, disappointments, restlessness, hopes and prayers, peace and brokenness.
 
The prayer we used to pray as children was almost right. Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake... What that last line should say is: If I should die before I live...
 
That’s a genuine plea; begging God not to let us miss whatever it was we were meant to know and experience in this life; that we wouldn’t die before we had the chance to fully live. It’s a reminder wrapped in genuine hope and life-giving fear that life is sacred, time is short, and every single one of us has a calling to fulfill, a mark to leave, and a God-honoring mission to complete. That’s a real prayer.
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Guardrails and emergency clinics

 
By Ben Disney
 
From "The Three Simple Rules: A Wesleyan Way of Living" by Reuben P. Job: "Do no harm. Do good. Stay in love with God."
 
Simple doesn’t mean simplistic; The Three Simple Rules embody a focused life of faith and conviction in the midst of a confusing and conflicted world.
 
A modern parable: A small town nestled in the mountains realizes it has a public relations problem. The town derives most of its revenue from the local ski resort that attracts tourists from all over the region. Unfortunately, the only way to get to the town and ski resort is by driving the long and treacherous road that winds around the mountain. In deep winter, which is also the peak season for tourists, the road becomes icy and dangerous; and, as a result, numerous tourists lose control of their cars and careen over the side of the mountain.
 
All in the town agree that this is particularly bad for their reputation and bad for the economy. So they meet at the town hall to find a solution. Some argue they should construct guard rails along the edge of the road at every turn to ensure the safety of the motorists. Others argue that, along with the installation of guard rails, a series of flashing signs could be posted warning the motorists of the danger. Still more chime in regarding other possible solutions.
 

In the end the city council votes not to install the guard rails or post the warning signs. Instead they decide to build a hospital emergency care clinic at the base of the mountain so they can quickly and easily attend to the injured as they slide off the road. So they do.
 
I suppose we need both guardrails and emergency clinics. After all, it’s a dangerous world out there and there are a lot of places and a lot of ways we can get hurt. But wouldn’t life be so much simpler if we decided to build more guardrails in the first place so we wouldn’t need so many emergency clinics?
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Full circle

 
By Ben Disney
 
“We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.”  T. S. Eliot
 
We’ve come to the final week of The Bible in 90 Days journey. More than 400 of our members made the commitment in January to read the Bible in its entirety from beginning to end. The journey included weekly teaching sessions and small group discussions led and facilitated by volunteers.
 

Countless individuals have expressed their surprise and appreciation for how this experience has changed their lives. People have shared with me the profound effect this journey continues to have on their marriage, relationships, outlook, and understanding.
   
Everyone has his or her own reaction. I can’t speak for each individual, but I can speak about the difference I believe it’s made in the church. Throughout this journey, worship has taken on a new and different feel. Instead of a congregation passively listening to words spoken from an individual, it feels more like a congregation actively engaged in a holy conversation. There’s a deeper Spirit that abounds when people are immersed in God’s Word and actively seeking the truth.
   
What excites me most is not just what has happened but what will come as a result of people taking seriously the effort to read and understand the Bible. I’m convinced God will do what God has always done: plant seeds, offer grace, love unconditionally, inspire hearts, and move people to fully become all that they were created to be. God will do something with and through our people in this journey.
   
Jesus said, “I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last.” So, if you’re finishing The Bible in 90 Days and it feels like you’ve come full circle, you’re in the right place.
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: A promise to stand under

 
By Ben Disney

In a groundbreaking book entitled “Overhearing the Gospel,” Fred Craddock poses the question: "How do we proclaim the gospel to people who have heard it all before - and have done so for years, and decades, and eons?" It offers an important reminder that the gospel is first and foremost a story that stirs the soul, captures the heart, and inflames the imagination.
 

For too long we’ve acted as if the resurrection can be proven through a carefully crafted, logical argument or using deductive reasoning. The truth is we gather every year to hear the same story. Aside from a few details, the various Biblical accounts describe the same event. To have heard this story for the first time in the first moments following the resurrection must have been shocking. But centuries later, we’ve heard it all many times before.
 
We know what happens, and we know the ending; but still we come. We come on a day like this, not expecting to be to be surprised or entertained. No, on a day like this we come to hear the story once again, to feel God’s presence, to be moved to the depths of our souls in the great mystery of what God has done in Christ Jesus.
 
In the end, “He is Risen” is not an explanation but an affirmation; not a concept to understand, but a promise to stand under.
 
/ / /
 
"I am the resurrection, and the life: whoever believes in me, even though he dies, yet shall he live: And whoever lives and believes in me shall never die."  John 11:25-26
 
"It’s not easy to convey a sense of wonder, let alone resurrection wonder, to another. It’s the very nature of wonder to catch us off guard, to circumvent expectations and assumptions. Wonder can’t be packaged, and it can’t be worked up. It requires some sense of being there and some sense of engagement.”  Eugene H. Peterson
 
"If Jesus rose from the dead, then you have to accept all that he said; if he didn't rise from the dead, then why worry about any of what he said? The issue on which everything hangs is not whether or not you like his teaching but whether or not he rose from the dead.”  Timothy Keller, "The Reason for God: Belief in an Age of Skepticism"
 
“If you live in the dark a long time and the sun comes out, you do not cross into it whistling. There's an initial uprush of relief at first, then - for me, anyway - a profound dislocation. My old assumptions about how the world works are buried, yet my new ones aren't yet operational. There's been a death of sorts, but without a few days in hell, no resurrection is possible.”  Mary Karr, "Lit"
 
“Remember Jesus of Nazareth, staggering on broken feet out of the tomb toward the Resurrection, bearing on his body the proud insignia of the defeat which is victory, the magnificent defeat of the human soul at the hands of God.”  Frederick Buechner, "The Magnificent Defeat"
 
"Easter says you can put truth in a grave, but it won't stay there."  Clarence W. Hall
 
"We live and die; Christ died and lived!"  John Stott
 
"Earth’s saddest day and gladdest day were just three days apart."  Susan Coolidge
 
"The proof that God raised Jesus from the dead is not the empty tomb, but the full hearts of his transformed disciples. The crowning evidence that he lives is not a vacant grave but a spirit-filled fellowship. Not a rolled-away stone, but a carried-away church."  Clarence Jordan
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: The resurrection explains you

 
By Ben Disney
 
“I pray that they will all be one, just as you and I are one - as you are in me, Father, and I am in you. And may they be in us so that the world will believe you sent me.” John 17:21
 
A man was stranded on a deserted Pacific island for years. Finally one day a boat comes sailing into view, and the man frantically waves and draws the skipper’s attention. The boat comes near the island and the sailor gets out and greets the stranded man. After a while the sailor asks, “What are those three huts you have here?”
   
“Well, that’s my house there.”
   
“What’s that next hut?” asks the sailor. “I built that hut to be my church.”
   
“What about the other hut?”
   
“Oh, that’s where I used to go to church.”
   
It was his hope and prayer. How well has it worked out? Well, according to the Dictionary of Christianity in America there are approximately 20,800 Christian denominations worldwide. One of the great historical conundrums is the desire for unity in the Body of Christ over and against the reality of a splintered and fragmented Christian community.
 

The issues that keep us separated from one another are innumerable, ranging from essential differences in doctrine and theology to petty arguments and trivial disagreements. If there is a contradictory hope, maybe it’s Easter. Perhaps the most unifying force for the vast majority of Christians across the world is Easter. The resurrection and mystery of what God has done in Christ Jesus on the cross is what most followers point to as the foundational truth of our faith. The resurrection forever separates Jesus from being defined simply as a learned teacher, wise rabbi, miracle worker, or social revolutionist.
   
Why Easter? Because it’s bigger than any of us. It transcends the little truths we try to patch together on our own to make sense of our lives. Nothing about the resurrection makes any logical sense; which is why I like William Willimon’s take on it: “You don’t explain the resurrection. The resurrection explains you.”
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: When does a church become a church?

 
By Ben Disney
 
When does a church actually become a church? It depends, of course. Do you mean theologically, administratively, or procedurally? In the United Methodist Church, a congregation becomes a church when it’s officially chartered and recognized by the Conference.
   
Years ago I helped organize a new church start that met in a local elementary school cafeteria. We met together as a congregation for three years before becoming an official chartered and recognized church. Come to think of it, I’m not sure what we were in those three years if we weren’t an officially recognized church. Technically, I suppose we were just seen as a loose collection of believers devoid of any official status; sort of in a theological no man’s land for church wannabes. Trust me, I know what we were. And frankly, I’ve always thought official titles are somewhat overrated.
   
So, when does a church actually become a church? Consider a couple of things I’ve observed over the last week. A family experiences the unimaginable pain and grief of losing their beautiful 21 year old daughter in a tragic car accident. There are no called meetings or official administrative board decisions or resolutions. People just begin to respond. Knowing there are no simple explanations or actions that can possibly explain or take away the intense pain the family is enduring, they begin to show up. They deliver meals to the home. They offer whatever words of comfort they can to the family. Another couple comes to mow their yard. Others come to hold their hands, pray with them, cry with them.
 

When the service is held at the church, Prayer Ministry partners arrive early to walk the sanctuary praying for the all those who will come; that God might heal the broken hearts of people who one week ago could never have imagined being in this place and having to say goodbye to one who was so young and full of life. Choir members come back on a Sunday afternoon to offer their unique gift of ministry; music so beautiful and powerful that it can heal a broken heart. Other members of the church, many who did not even know the family or the young lady who died, show up for the service simply to stand with the family and to be fully present with them in their deepest pain and grief.
   
When does a church become a church? I think you know; which is why I’ve never been more proud to call this place my church.
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Who was Jesus addressing?

 
By Ben Disney
 
Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Matthew 19:14
 
Ironic, isn’t it? The #1 grossing movie in the U.S. is “The Lorax,” based on a children’s book by Dr. Seuss. It’s a book written primarily for children, but adults will discover a deeper meaning buried in the animation.
 
Someone recently gave me a book entitled “Lessons Kids Need to Learn” by David Staal. The book is a practical guide to raising healthy children and nurturing their emotional, physical, and spiritual well-being.
 

Briefly, here are the chapter titles: 1. Believe That You Matter / Live Like Others Matter More. 2. Appreciate Those Who Serve You / Make Serving Others a Priority. 3. Forget Unimportant Stuff / Remember Life Has Consequences. 4. Be a People Person / Be Your Own Person. 5. Find Your Unique Fit / Find Out You Can Fail. 6. Always Speak Up / Only Speak the Truth. 7. Faith, Hope, and Love.
   
It’s a list of simple lessons that can make a world of difference for any child. Sadly, some children will never hear these words spoken or see them modeled by any influential adult in their lives.
   
But as you read the list, you’ll discover that, although it’s written with children in mind, it’s the adults who need to hear it the most. Makes me wonder who Jesus was talking to when the children started gathering around Him. Ironic, isn’t it?
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Being fools

 
By Ben Disney
 
“If at first the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it.”  Albert Einstein
 
“To believe in God is impossible - to not believe in Him is absurd.”  Voltaire
 
“It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.”  Anne Frank
 
“You have to stop worrying about looking foolish, ‘cause fear of being humiliated really limits you.”  Dean Koontz
 
“If you fear nothing, then you are not brave. You are merely too foolish to be afraid.”  Laurell K. Hamilton
 
Alice laughed: “There’s no use trying,” she said, “one can’t believe impossible things.” “I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” said the Queen. “When I was younger, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”   from Alice in Wonderland
 
“Remove from Christianity its ability to shock and it is altogether destroyed. It then becomes a tiny superficial thing, capable neither of inflicting deep wounds nor of healing them.”  Soren Kierkegaard
 
“We are fools for Christ.”  1 Corinthians 4:10
 

As William Willimon notes: “One of the dangers of being in church as often as I am is that it all starts to make sense.” He’s right of course. Here we are in the midst of Lent, diligently reading our Bibles and following Jesus all the way to Jerusalem, and somehow it all seems so perfectly natural and orderly.
   
We’ve become so familiar with the stories – so comfortable in our rituals – that few of us ever stop to think just how absurd all of this must seem to the average person. He heals the sick, restores sight to the blind, raises the dead... but can’t save Himself from being executed by the Romans? He’s buried in a sealed tomb and yet three days later He starts appearing in the oddest of places and only to a small group of people who already believed in Him.
   
I mean, it could have really helped His case if He would have just come back to downtown Jerusalem and made a couple of appearances to Pilate and the massive crowds who watched Him die. It would also make it much easier if Jesus would make an appearance now and then to the skeptics, cynics, and non-believers in our culture.
   
We put ashes on our forehead and hand each other a piece of bread and a cup of juice representing the body and blood of a Palestinian Jew who lived thousands of years ago, and we no longer think that’s an odd thing to do? In a world that demands empirical evidence for anything to be true, our Christian view of faith and belief in things we cannot see probably seems shaky at best. If we’re honest, sometimes Jesus makes it hard for us to make the argument for Him.
 
Don’t forget how absurd this whole journey really is in contrast to the world around us. But, lest you think you’re the only foolish one, look around and see the absurdity of the way the world lives. It’s 2012 and we still can’t figure out how to live on this planet without hating, oppressing, hurting, or killing each other. At least Paul got it right: “We are fools for Christ.” Which means if we’re going to be fools anyway, we might as well be fools for something that really matters.
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Do our words tear down... or build up?

 
By Ben Disney
 
I file this under the category of “Wrong Words, Wrong Time.” A funeral is often the catalyst for every raw emotion imaginable, from profound sadness to deep gratitude; from excruciating pain to a celebration of pure joy. As my clergy friends would confirm, a death in the family often brings out the best and worst in people. But even that doesn’t fully explain the following news story:
 
“----- -------’s obituary notice in a Florida newspaper wound up revealing more about her children, at least in the eyes of son ----, who authored the obit. The obituary, which included details of the funeral service, also stated his personal opinion that his sister 'betrayed her mother’s trust' and his brother 'broke his mother’s heart.'"
 
It’s difficult to imagine anyone using the death of a loved one as a format to project their personal anger and to inflict further pain on family members. A newspaper obit doesn’t seem to be the appropriate place, but I suppose in a culture bereft of boundaries and devoid of filters, it’s sad but hardly surprising.
 
In the end it’s more than a longing for greater civility or a wishful uptick in the politeness index; it’s about our tragic propensity to use words as weapons. Words are a commodity whose primary use is determined by its owner. Depending on who says them, how they’re spoken, and when they’re offered, words can heal or words can hurt. Words can be used to build up or tear down. They have the power to inspire, create, motivate, and transform. But in the same breath they can also destroy, obliterate, and kill anything or anyone in their path.
 

Jesus used words as the primary tools for his life, purpose, and mission. He used words to make a point, reveal a greater truth, tell a story, or cut through the hypocrisy of the moment. Words matter. In the end what he said or refused to say eventually cost him his life. It’s his words we so carefully preserve; it’s his words we’ve chosen to remember long after the initial sound of them faded into history. Jesus used words to such a degree that he finally and fully became the Word.
 
Which is a long way to say if you want to be more like Jesus, then trying to talk more like Jesus is probably a good place to start. Of course it can’t stop there, and there’s certainly more to it than that. But we all have to start somewhere.
 
According to one study it’s estimated that women speak an average of 16,215 words each day while men on average speak 15,669 words in a normal day. That’s a mouthful by any stretch of the imagination. So, in the name of God, choose carefully, communicate wisely, and speak lovingly.
 
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ArborlawnUMC.org

A Word from the Pastor: Language of the church

 
By Ben Disney
 
First, an explanation of the journey: Lent is the 40-day period before Easter when Christians prepare to witness and celebrate the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. In the early church, the 40 days before Easter were devoted to study of the essential elements of Christian teaching so that new converts could make their confessions of faith on the day of their baptism. Later, Lent became a time of contemplation of Jesus’ suffering and the significance of the Christian faith for daily life. Christians throughout the centuries have marked the season with prayer, study, and fasting; or, more recently, by sacrificially “giving something up for Lent” as a way of identifying with Jesus (who fasted in the wilderness for 40 days) and by focusing on the importance of faith. Lent starts on Ash Wednesday and runs to Maundy Thursday, which covers a period of 40 days, not including Sundays.
 
As I write this, I’m acutely aware of how archaic and foreign the language must seem to people in our culture. Look at the words: witness, converts, fasted, confession, Lent, sacrificially, contemplation, Maundy Thursday, and Ash Wednesday. I mean, who still talks like that?
 

I’ll apologize in advance. Remember, I didn’t say it; I’m only repeating it. Years ago in one of my earliest churches, I became friends with an old rancher who raised horses. He was highly knowledgeable and well respected. He was also extremely shy and quiet, preferring for the most part to be alone in a pasture rather than being in a crowd of people. His biggest fear was speaking in public, which explains his genuine fear and anxiety in being asked to speak to a large gathering at a convention of horse breeders. He reluctantly agreed but agonized over the thought of having to deliver a speech. He asked for my prayers and advice, both of which I offered. The following week he returned from the gathering and immediately called to tell me all about the event. I asked how the speech went. He replied, “It was great! They even gave me a standing ovulation.” While I’m not sure that was even a medical possibility, I think I understood his point.
 
The point is words matter. Language is used to convey a particular meaning or a message. The church often struggles with the balancing act of trying to stay relevant in a changing culture while holding fast to the core convictions of its faith. In our quest to speak in the language of the culture we often discard ancient words because we suspect few people really understand their meaning or appreciate their value. Besides, everyone knows if you want to grow a church in this day and age, you better be using words that sell; like self esteem, happiness, empowerment, and success.
 
Every once in a while, the church has to decide what language it will use. Either the church becomes more like the world or the church really believes it has something invaluable to teach and offer the world. Will the rest of the world listen if we keep using ancient, archaic words like confession, repentance, witness, and sacrifice? I don’t know. But I do know the moment we stop using those kinds of particular words, the church will no longer be the church.
 
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A Word from the Pastor: Finding hidden treasures

 
By Ben Disney
 
Two recent news stories of note:
 
A Bartlett (TN) man found thousands of dollars inside an old safe he purchased for $122.93 on eBay. The seller didn't have access to the combination and sold it "as is" assuming the locked safe was empty. Upon receipt, the buyer brought the safe to a welder, who cut it open. Inside the safe the buyer found $26,000 in cash. When the seller was informed of the discovery he suggested the buyer share half the money with him. The buyer declined, citing the seller's policy stating: "What you see is what you get, no returns, and no money back."
 
An elderly Illinois man accidentally donated a suit stuffed with $13,000 in bills to Goodwill. The 80 year old, from Moline, decided to keep his life savings in his closet rather than in a bank because he thought the money would be safer there. But his plan backfired when he absentmindedly donated the cash-stuffed suit. It's believed the suit may have been sold already.
 
It's hard to imagine selling a locked safe you assumed was empty only to find out later it was full of money; or discovering that you just gave away an old suit lined with $13,000. How could you not know what you had in your possession, especially when it's so valuable? If you really knew what you had, wouldn't you be more careful about protecting and keeping it? The answer, of course, is yes. No one in his or her right mind would ever throw away a fortune or toss away a treasure if he or she really understood the value of what it meant; which is precisely the point.
 

The truth is we see it all the time: smart people doing dumb things. The truth is we do it all the time. Every last one of us has been given this incredible treasure, and the reality is sometimes we don't know it, appreciate it, or even believe it. Not knowing what we really have, we end up stupidly giving, trading, selling, or throwing it all away. When it's all gone, we suddenly wake up and realize, perhaps for the first time, what we've truly lost.
 
Maybe it's a good time to take an inventory of what you have. Chances are you have some hidden treasure that you've probably overlooked or forgotten about. Go through the list. If you're still not sure whether or not something on your list is all that valuable or important, ask yourself where it came from and who gave it to you. Once you figure that out, it's easier to put a price tag on it.
 
But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.
2 Corinthians 4:7
 
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A Word from the Pastor: Complicated yet simple

 
By Ben Disney

“You do not really understand something unless you can explain it to your grandmother.”  Albert Einstein
 
“The more we understand individual things, the more we understand God.”  Benedict De Spinoza
 
“To understand the whole, it is necessary to understand the parts. To understand the parts, it is necessary to understand the whole. Such is the circle of understanding.”  Ken Wilber, Eye of Spirit
 
“Everything is both simpler than we can imagine and more complicated that we can conceive.”  Goethe 

“If you take care of the little things, the big things take care of themselves.”  R. Reese
 
“God is in the details.”  Mies Van Der Rohe
 
We live in a complex and complicated world. There are few boundaries left that shelter any of us from global events. A political uprising in a distant nation, an economic collapse in a foreign country, or the simple fear of a disruption in the flow of vital commodities can have a direct and immediate effect upon our lives.
   
The challenge of life is to be fully engaged and fully aware of the complexities without being overwhelmed or paralyzed by them. The other option is to close your eyes and pretend nothing matters outside your own small circle, but that’s both dumb and dangerous.
   
In the midst of life’s complexities, Jesus had a remarkable gift of paring it all down to the basic essential core. When asked to sum up everything he knew about God, the truth, the scriptures, and life in general, he said, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind. And love your neighbor as yourself.” Is it that complicated? Maybe. Can it be that simple? Yes.
 

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A Word from the Pastor: Learn. Understand. Believe. Trust. Follow.

 
By Ben Disney
 
"The task of leadership is not to put greatness into people but to elicit it, for the greatness is there already."  John Buchan, Scottish politician, author (1875-1940)
 
"Our chief want is someone who will inspire us to be what we know we could be."  Ralph Waldo Emerson, author, poet, philosopher (1803-1882)
 
"Lead me, follow me, or get out of the way."  George S. Patton, Army general (1885-1945)
 
"You can't lead anyone else further than you have gone yourself."  Gene Mauch, Major League player and manager (1925-2005)
 
"Leaders don’t create followers, they create more leaders."  Tom Peters (1942-)
 
The portrait of Jesus prominently displayed in my home church portrayed a safe, mild mannered individual with soft features and a kind face. The portrait of Jesus we find in the gospels is that, but also so much more if you look deeper. If you ever suspected there might be a distinct difference between the cleaned up and sanitized version of Jesus and the real Jesus we find in the gospels, you’re not alone. Take heart, at times the original followers found Jesus to be wildly unpredictable, dangerously defiant, and maddeningly polarizing.
 

He never seemed to follow a schedule or stick to the planned agenda except when he set his face toward Jerusalem, at which point nothing on heaven or earth could have stopped him. He hung around people of questionable character and picked fights with people who wanted to kill him, which they eventually found a way to do of course. He rarely gave a direct answer to a direct question, choosing instead to tell strange little open ended stories that left some people scratching their heads in confusion.
 
All he had to do to prove Himself was perform a few more spectacular miracles in public; but, for reasons we’ll never fully understand, he chose not to. When people wanted to take the easy way out, he would lay down the law and tell them how wrong they were. When others would come to him looking down at their shoes because they were so ashamed and convinced they weren’t worth a plug nickel, he’d tell them how good they were. If you felt beat up and dirty he’d pick you up and clean you up. If you thought you were holier than thou, that kind of perfect love and purity reminded you just how far you still had to go to be anything like him.
 
The irony is those who knew Jesus the best, at times understood him the least. If you think you have Jesus all figured out, be careful. We’re talking the Son of God, not a dashboard savior we carry with us for protection and good luck.
 
Suffice it to say:
 
Learning about Jesus is relatively easy.
 
Knowing and understanding the real Jesus is a monumental challenge.
 
Believing in Jesus may require you to re-examine everything you thought you once knew.
 
Trusting Jesus may cause you to call into question the very things you used to trust and rely upon.
 
Actually following Jesus is the hardest thing most of us will ever do.
 
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A Word from the Pastor: Hurts so much, means so much

 
By Ben Disney

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”  Alfred Lord Tennyson
 
It’s a phrase many of us have heard over the years. The line comes from the writings of Alfred Lord Tennyson who also wrote “The Charge of the Light Brigade.” The particular line is from the poem "In Memoriam," which Tennyson wrote after the death of his beloved friend Arthur Hallam. Tennyson had met Hallam in 1829, when they were both students at Trinity College, Cambridge. Hallam's sudden death in 1833 caused Tennyson to enter into a deep and dark period of despair.
 

In essence it means you’re given a choice: 1) to love another person deeply but with the knowledge that you would one day have to bear the pain of saying goodbye; or 2) that you could avoid the pain and agony that comes in losing a loved one but the cost and trade off would be to never fully experience the depth and joy of love. Which would you choose?
 
If you’re looking for a third option there is none. Intentionally or unintentionally we all make the choice. Some, who cannot imagine bearing the pain of losing someone they love, decide instead to close their hearts, shut down their emotions, and refuse to ever get close to another person. Others, knowing full well the cost that comes with giving your heart to another, decide that in the end the exchange is worth it. Whatever pain they may feel when grief comes to them, is overshadowed by the joy they feel in the gift of love and life that can never fully be taken from them.
 
Part of the joy of serving a church is the sheer privilege of getting to know and love some of the most remarkable people God ever created. Part of the pain of ministry comes in having to say goodbye to people you’ve loved deeply. Of course you do that as well. In a church like this, we’re always bound by a higher calling and a deeper commitment. Every week we make a clear choice to open our hearts to God, to life, to others, knowing full well the risk that comes with it. It’s a guaranteed, no questions asked, foolproof way of ensuring that at some point your heart will be broken. And yet, in spite of all the pain, the agony, and the grieving, there’s not a single one of us that wouldn’t still choose option 1.
 
I wish I had a better option for you, but I didn’t make the rules. God did. The One who watched his son die on the cross probably knows more than we do about pain and grief. All that’s to say, after we say goodbye to the people we love, the best thing we can do is fight through the pain and offer a deep prayer of gratitude for the one we have loved and lost. Then at some point we’ll resolve to open up our hearts again because doing anything less would cause us to miss the whole point of life. It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all; which is why it hurts so much, and why it means so much. We’ll miss you Dub.
 
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A Word from the Pastor: A message waiting for you

 
By Ben Disney
 
At its worst urban graffiti is destructive, unsightly and illegal. It defaces property and often promotes gang violence.
 

There are, however, rare moments of insight and humor that appear in the most unlikely places. Here are a few examples of wisdom scrawled on walls and buildings from those who long to be heard in a world of noise and chaos:
 
“Laughter translates into any language.”
 
“Is there life before death?”
 
“A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.”
 
“Is there intelligent life on earth? Yes, but I'm only visiting.”
 
"I’m bored."
 
“If ignorance is bliss, there should be more happy people.”
 
“You're too good for him.” [A sign over the mirror in a women's rest room, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA.]
 
“God is not dead but alive and well and working on a much less ambitious project.”
 
“We are the people our parents warned us about.”
 
It’s one thing to have random thoughts and words scribbled on a wall. It’s something altogether different to have sacred words inscribed on your heart; which is what happens when God holds the pen or when you realize God holds your life.
 
“Clearly, you are a letter from Christ showing the result of our ministry among you. This 'letter' is written not with pen and ink, but with the Spirit of the living God. It is carved not on tablets of stone, but on human hearts.” 2 Corinthians 3:3
 
So the next time you forget who you are, or you’re not sure what to do, my suggestion is don’t look up. Look in; as in inside your heart. There’s a message waiting for you from the One who made you.
 
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A Word from the Pastor: Changing our destiny

 
By Ben Disney
 
Isaiah 43: For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it?
 
How long does it take to break a bad habit? How long does it take to establish a new behavior or pattern? For years, the conventional answer has been 21 days. Whether the goal is to lose weight, eat healthier, or quit smoking, it was thought to take a minimum of 21 days of changed behavior to break existing patterns and significantly change one’s lifestyle.
 

All of that is now being called into question. In a recently published study in the European Journal of Social Psychology, researchers from the University College London have determined it takes much longer to effectively break old habits and create new ones. How much longer? According to the study it takes on average 66 days of a commitment to intentionally change habits for any long term results or lasting affects to occur.
   
Maybe that explains some of the frustration we feel when we’re unable to make the changes we want for ourselves. We set goals, make promises, set out to change our lives with the best of intentions, only to stumble, fall short, get discouraged, give up, or fail in our efforts. Perhaps the study is telling us something about our own psychology and theology. There’s a tipping point in trying to change who we are and what we do. Real change doesn’t happen overnight nor does it happen easily. We tried and failed. Maybe we didn’t stick with it long enough or we didn’t understand the effort was less about eliminating a single bad habit and more about changing our entire lifestyle; which means there really are no quick fixes or fast cures for the body or the soul.
 
I was thinking about The Bible in 90 Days challenge we launched this week. As of now we have more than 400 people signed up and reading. It’s a remarkable movement, and I’m genuinely excited about what God is doing in people’s lives and in the life of this church. I know the argument: "How can you possibly learn everything there is to know about the Bible in just 90 days?" The answer, of course, is “You can’t.” The better answer is that as people read God’s Word, God will begin to open our hearts and minds to reveal the deep truth we long to know.
   
Having said all that, maybe the real miracle of this journey is not that you will accrue vast amounts of Biblical, theological, and historical knowledge. It’s tough to do in 90 days, but you’ll be surprised by how much you will learn. Maybe the real miracle is that for the next 90 days so many of you are making a concerted effort and a deep commitment to immerse yourselves in God’s Word every day; that you are carving out a part of each day for the singular hope and purpose of drawing closer to God and seeking more clarity and understanding of God’s plan for your life.
    
Is it possible the real miracle is less obvious? Given the research on human behavior, reading the Bible everyday for 90 days helps us to form new habits, which in turn creates new patterns, which ultimately holds the promise of producing significant and lasting change. What’s the old line about change?
   
Thoughts become words. Words become actions. Actions become habits. Habits become patterns. Patterns become character. And character becomes your destiny.
   
And you thought we were just talking about tackling a 90-day Bible study? No. We’re really talking about the possibility of changing our destiny; which is what God is best at and what I trust God is about to do.
 
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